One of the main
problems of being a graduate type is that when you graduate and don't
fall into your dream job (or indeed any job at all), it leads to a
strangely existential crisis. You see, for years and years you were
just 'a student'. Okay, not just a student, but the studying was
essential to your understanding on yourself. Student discount,
student politics, student feminism, student geek, student historian.
They come with their own assumptions and values, which can often be
negative but have positive connotations for the student themselves.
My sister thinks students are lazy scum, but I rather like students.
So the crisis when you
leave university and lose the label is something of a traumatic
thing. Having been defined for so long by your full-time life, it's
horrible having to be 'Second Accounts Assistant' or 'Retail
Assistant' because quite simply it's not as snappy a title. Even
those in their dream jobs are generally struggling a little, as many
titles don't trip off the tongue. And 'job seeker' just doesn't sound
good, even if it's not a negative thing in itself.
Tackling it is
difficult. I take the self-deprecation route, myself, and go for
'Office Monkey' or 'Admin Bitch' depending on my mood. Or I lie at
parties, which is morally wrong but I like to see what I can get away
with. It was a moment of some distress when I got married and filled
in a census in a twelve-month period and realised that I would,
historically speaking, forever be tarred as 'Administration Clerk'
for the rest of my life. Hell, I put down 'clerk' instead of
'assistant' just to sound a bit more historical. I wanted to put
astronaut, but the council office were pretty insistent that was
illegal. I wonder if on <i>Who Do You Think You Are 2150</i>
some descendent will look at me and just think I was boring based on
the records. I hope not.
My trick, these days,
is to look at the other things in my life, and create a series of
labels that aren't based around my job. Yes, I'm an office monkey,
and that is a big part of my life. I'm also a writer. I'm a feminist.
I'm a geek. I'm lots of things that are separate to me as a worker,
and it's with that I keep my happiness and my sanity.
- -
Another label I can
take on for the next fortnight is 'traveller'. Having managed to get
my laptop back, I'm on the road as of Friday, finally getting to go
on honeymoon. As I only have a year left to be classed as a 'young
person' (another label!) according to Interrail standards, I'm off
around Europe for two weeks with Mr DG and probably too much beer. As
such, this is another hiatus announcement, but things should settle
down when I'm back. Probably.
This was timely. I have been having horrible angst and debt-related terror and worries that This Is It for the rest of my life.
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